How to hire a marketer who does crazy sh*t 💃

What to write in the job description, where to find them, and how to make them say "yes".

I have a weird hobby.

Since 2020, every time I see a job description with a line that makes me go “omg yes THAT’S what makes a great marketer”, I copy it into a Google Doc.

It’s 50+ pages now.

I know, it’s weird. But it turned out to be one of the most useful things I’ve ever done.

Because in February 2026, Kalshi posted the most unhinged job description yet:

Kalshi knew exactly who they wanted and exactly how to describe them, so much so they’re willing to pay up to $8,000,000/year for that person.

Most companies have no idea how to do this ❌

I’ve been a hiring manager for over a decade, sat through 100+ interviews. The kind of marketers I end up hiring pull off the crazy stunts I write about in this newsletter. I learned which ones turned into superstars and which ones burned budgets and time.

And the #1 reason companies fail at hiring marketers? The job description itself:

• ❌ “5-7 years of experience in B2B SaaS”

• ❌ “Manage cross-functional stakeholders”

• ❌ “Develop and execute marketing strategies”

Every company writes these. But they attract traditional marketers. Not people who do disruptive things that go viral.

So I built a template.

One modular job description with “blocks” for creative stunts, analytics, community, content, paid growth, product-led growth, partnerships, and technical stuff. Each requirement is built from real phrases and patterns that worked in the best JDs I've collected over 6 years. Pick the skill sets that match your role, delete the rest.

Then I wrote down everything else I know about hiring unconventional marketers: How to spot them. Where to find them. How to make them say yes.

This article has everything you need to hire a marketer who ACTUALLY moves the needle. ✅

Here’s what you’re getting:

1. 📋 The full job description template (keep it forever)

2. 💾 My full 50+ page database of the best marketing job descriptions ever written + highlighted phrases you can steal

3. 🔍 The 8 things I look for in candidates after 100+ interviews (with how to check each one)

4. 🗺️ Where to actually find these people (not on LinkedIn Jobs)

5. 💰 When to hire and when to wait (most CEOs hire too early)

6. 📅 The first 90 days plan for what your new hire should actually do

First things first, download the template using this secret link: